seeking peace.

Today was one of those days. Probably because last night was one of those nights. Wyatt and I were awake far more than we were asleep. It left both of us deliriously tired and completely out of sorts all day today. He fought sleep and I was fighting for him to sleep...the more he fought the more I would fight, too. He would cry and rub his eyes and yawn and repeat, repeat, repeat...I would sway and sing and walk back and forth and back and forth and offer him milk and repeat, repeat, repeat...to no avail. I'd give him toys while I tried to work, offer him the bouncy seat, nothing was working. At the end of the workday we were both frustrated and so very tired.

Defeated, I decided that we were going home an hour early. As I snapped his car seat in its base and leaned forward to kiss his forehead with a "Let's go home! I'll see you there, my love," he looked deeply back at me with those beautiful eyes of his. I started the car, turned up the air, and hopped in the backseat next to him. He immediately smiled and grabbed my finger. "Let's pray, Wyatt, okay?" And I prayed out loud to the Mighty God, the Prince of Peace, the Creator, our Sustainer, the All-Sufficient One Who graciously holds us in His hands. Oh how I needed Him.

Once we arrived home, I put on the Rend Collective station on Pandora, scooped up Wyatt, and we started dancing and swaying and singing around the living room. My tense shoulders loosened and his smile got bigger and bigger. I smiled and he laughed.

Later on, as I took a break from making dinner to check on him in his bouncy seat, I leaned forward to kiss him and he reached forward with both hands to hold my face. It was the first time he's ever done that and it melted me.

"Cease striving. Know that I am God." In these situations - in any situation - I need to just stop striving and just be. Just rest in God's peace because He will keep me in perfect peace when my mind is fixed on Him. Not on things that need to be done or situations that I want to change. Just on Him alone.