In some ways, I can't believe we're this close to meeting our little guy already. In others, it seems like it's been forever...and we still have a long way to go.
There are a lot of thoughts running through this pregnant lady's head.
Things I want to remember:
- how overjoyed Cody was at our 20-week ultrasound, when he saw that Baby K is a boy; 'twas by far the happiest I have ever seen him (and he's a really happy guy)
- repeating Baby K's name over and over again when we found the perfect middle name to go with his great first one
- how Baby K would suddenly move and kick during God time in the evenings
- the generosity of friends in providing everything we needed; thank You, God, for Your provision!
- seeing the line immediately appear on the pregnancy test; such an unexpected gift on Christmas morning!
- even when I was sick with pneumonia, my thirst and appetite were still strong and Baby K remained healthy
- the awe in how God perfectly knitted Baby K together inside of me over these last nine months; one week he was the size of a sesame seed, a couple weeks later he had limb buds, then a brain...God's an incredible Creator!
- many times it looked like I had two belly buttons; Baby K liked to poke out a heel (fist?) right above my belly button
- seeing all of the blood vessels on my growing stomach; it's crazy to think that there's a life in there
- feeling him move and kick
- not worrying about my food belly showing after I eat a big meal
- strangers asking me when I'm due, responding with "any day now!", and seeing them so excited!
- having to stand two feet away from Cody when I hug him
- feeling so helpless by not being able to lift/move things
- being short of breath
- my very limited maternity wardrobe; I was a bit too stubbornly thrifty
- random mood swings! and tears that come out of nowhere!
- the challenge of moving and bending
- not being able to hold him!
- the anticipation of when he's coming
...the anticipation of when he's coming. I've been struggling a bit with that one. Even though we're not technically to our due date, I know he can come anytime from now until the middle of September. I've never been patient at waiting! I want him here now! This date would be a great one for our little guy's birthday! Or August 21, or 23, or 27 or 31. But I want to see him and hold him and the sooner, the better!
I have to constantly remind myself that God is in control. He is Baby K's creator. He loves Baby K so much more than we ever will. He holds this little guy in the palm of His hands which is the best place for him to be, even though I long to hold him in my arms. God, in His perfect omniscient way, knows the best day for Baby K to come. And God, being both all-powerful and all-loving, will provide me with the grace and the strength I need to get through these last days/weeks of pregnancy.
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